Gosh, I am sorry to hear that skippernlilg. Wish I had some words of wisdom to offer, all we can do at times like these is adjust our sails, and navigate towards calmer waters.......
When unwelcome news, such as yours, finds me, I always try to remember that the knowing the truth is better than living a lie. Everything happens for a reason, my friend.
Sending you a hug. Take care and may the New Year bring you peace.