Bobby....a big hug to you. What many of us have discovered that the grieving process has a life of its own. I think for me initially, its such crisis management and dealing with practical realities of dealing with a drinker. Later on...as we maneuver through the toughest crisis parts, we settle a bit, and have time to take an inventory of where we are. THEN the true grieving begins in earnest. So it's not so unusual that you are just noticing the grief.
What I did, (right along side of the crisis management) is get rid of every single item of his, or anything associated with him. I had to make the trips of garbage bags of his stuff...but every morsel of his stuff, I got out of my space in the first two weeks. I had to. I feel it would have prolonged my agony to have to look at, smell and live with his stuff. It helped!! I have a friend who is an officiant coming over today to do a house clearing: a ceremony of clearing my space, and healing. We'll state the positive intention for my home in every room....and will pay special attention to the AH's "man cave" where all the drinking was hidden and the room that carries such negative images for me. So those are the steps I've taken and am taking to re-claim my space: physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. The house has been completely emptied of his things, now spiritually a little ritual to heal the feelings.
Please be gentle with yourself during this time. You are the LAST person to be mad at! Gather your loving friends, and consider what steps you might take that would be meaningful to you, to help you move on.
Biggest hugs!