nicam

Do you guys agree alcoholism/addiction is a symptom of a personality disorder in most cases? I know my XABF was BPD/NPD, and on a few occasions completely ASPD. Basically, all the cluster B's.

I read a study once that suggested over 90% of alcoholics/addicts observed in a controlled psychiatric environment were found to suffer from an underlying personality disorder. In most cases several overlapping (co-morbid) personality disorders. Hence, the concept of the "dry drunk," and persisting problems and instability after eliminating the addictive substance, is attributed 100% to these preexisting disorders.

The other school of thought seems to be that alcoholism mimics the traits of cluster B personality disorders in particular (isn't it even in the big book that alcoholism/addiction leads to sociopath/psychopath behaviors and though processes?). As in, the disordered behavior is caused by the substance abuse, and any problems persisting after recovery are attributed to behaviors learned while in active addiction.

I started researching mainly to understand what was happening to ME as a result of being involved with this disordered person...

In relationships with personality disordered people/addicts we are brainwashed, abused, idealized and devalued, blamed, used, and worst of all trauma-bonded to our abusers, codependent, obsessed, and addicted ourselves. We become isolated in the cycle of abuse, our foundation and reality blown out from under us. We lose control of ourselves, of our lives completely. We lose faith and trust in our sanity and capabilities. Who we were before the A becomes a memory. We become ugly, as ugly as them. Yet, we do not know how to exist without our A's and we perpetuate the magical thinking, the fantasy, which by now requires an abandon of all logic and core values to maintain, until...when?

If you read the experiences of people who have had relationships with sociopaths, narcissists, bpds, are they any different than ours? It's really some serious s*@! we put ourselves through with them, knocked my socks off like I never would have imagined anything could. PTSD, probably adrenal fatigue, permanent damage to our chemical neurotransmitters or something...you know? I still have flashbacks, still doubt my sanity and worth as a person, still break NC and want this person in some sick way knowing he is emotionally 4 years-old and incapable of truly reciprocating love at the very least, and at the very most is dangerously abusive.

Sorry so long and to ramble, but was wondering what you guys thought about this connection and any personal experiences with PDs.