BreakingGlass-
I have found a number of the RI meetings in the southern part of the state very helpful and to have warm, inviting people. In general I found it to be an active group, state etc.
I knew my exAH struggled with alcohol one day before I had known him two years. It took me another five years to get into the doors of Al-anon. My only regret is all of the time I wasted. Growing up in a very religious family I was very concerned about the God concept that I had heard talked about in regards to 12 Step groups. Just before finding myself going to Al-anon I was using the religion of my birth as an adjective "Oh this feels C......." whenever I was feeling guilty, giving too much of myself etc.
I have found Al-anon has helped me get a handle on MY spirtuality and what works for me. That is only one of the gifts of Al-anon that I have gained. It not only helped me in my relationships with all the As in my life, but has helped me in relationships in general. I am actually starting to learn boundaries and I am not sure I thought that was ever possible.
I have also done a lot of individual counseling which has been very helpful. We tried marriage counseling, but my exAH and I were on different recovery paths and this did not work as well for us. I did see our marriage counselor some on my own which was really, really helpful.
It took me a bit to feel comfortable with the journey of recovery, but I am so grateful and glad that I took those rocky first steps. It has been the best gift to myself.