BobbyJ

I havent been on here for awhile. But took sometime today and read thru some post. Guess, I got intrigued to write this post after reading some of them and dealing with a recent friend in an alcohol relationship...

Question: Was your spouse drinking when you 1st met them?

Now, that I look back, mine was and so did I. We would go out every
other Friday night and have a couple of drinks.

But his continued thru the week..

""The night caps, The stressful day cocktail,
The I worked hard drink, The celebration bottle""

Looking back, every drink, had a reason, a name or a cause...

So was he mean, complusive, cheating, dishonest, dysfunctional back then?
I would have to answer YES to a few of them.
Was I in denial of them, YES
Did I see it all, NO
Was I un-educated in alcohlism, YES
Did I think he was going to change, YES

Did he change? YES< Alcoholism progresses & it did what it was suppose to do...

So many of us, have wonderful spouses
or wonderful friendships, then when alcoholism takes over that person.
We blame it all on alcoholism or that person.
We are shocked by their behavior, We are devastated and
have broken hearts & souls.

But I have asked myself:

(1) Did I ever really know him, when he wasnt drinking or
as a sober healthy individual?

(2) What was he like when he was sober? Guess until I hear
it from his mother what he was like as a teenager. I will never know.

It passes thru my mind, that I sometimes forget, that he was drinking
when we first met...

Have I changed? Yes. If I ever meet someone again, I will see the red
flags and run like hell.....

I have been digging deep to answer some of my own questions
This one really has helped me, so I thought I would share...

Love To All....