It's 24 hours later and I have him packing his things. He will leave my house, and our relationship, early tomorrow morning. I am lucky to have loving people texting me, and this new resource to help bolster my resolve, as I sit here quietly listening to him pack and make his plans. My sadness makes me soft. I need to follow through with this. My dreams and hopes and love for him feel alternately like illusions and denial. I guess I will never know and will have to be at peace with that.