cuyootoo

hello all, i have about 23 or 24 days sober, i am not really sure... i have a lot of reasons to quit drinking and i know that alcohol has been a problem for me. i keep trying to tell myself that maybe i can control my drinking... i don't really feel that much better, i am really depressed and feel really bad about what my life has become. and drinking will make me feel better.

things are a lot better for me now that i am sober, but i am still not really happy. i was happier when i was drinking and i don't really know how to be happy sober, and i don't even know even if i want to be sober. well i want to be happy and be sober. i don't want to be miserable and be sober... how can i stop being so miserable when i am sober???

it's like i feel like i am stuck in this sort of brain fog, though it seems to be clearing a little, i just don't feel like my brain is working as good as it used too... i have been in this depressive foggy state before and snapped out of it, so there is hope. i hope i am not brain damaged...

i think it's more like depression than brain damage, but isn't depression a form of brain damage??? i don't know, at least it is helpful to put these feelings down into words.