Oh, RECF, I know that is not easy.
My xH and I divorced in 2001, I was 37 at the time. I, too, mourned what I thought of as the loss of my opportunity to have children. I did go back to school, and remarried in 2009, so I'm now, well, closer to 50 than 40.
I don't believe it's possible for me to have children at this point, but I am glad that I did not have them with my xH. He would have made a terrible father.
At 34, you still have time to begin again.......if that is what you want. But you are the only one who can decide whether a lifetime with an alcoholic just to have children is worth it.
Many hugs, HG