I understand. When I talked to him this a.m. I made it about me and what I need and what this addiction has done to me. Yesterday he was a complete mess and crying, but today he seemed to be actually sad and broken that he has hurt me so much and that he didn't really realize it.
I told him that I need to not live with him if he is using (which "technically" he isn't right now)
I told him that I need to not be in a relationship with someone who is going to lie to me (and he said to ask him anything, he will be honest, and upfront about anything, which he did)
I told him I can't live in this mess of checking on him and trying to "figure out" if he is lying or not, and I read him some of my journals entries (and he appeared to be sad about how this has affected me and said he wants me to be the strong person he knows I am and wants me well, too, and he said that he knows he has to get better and I have to, and after he asked for one week to show me he did go on to add that he will accept whatever I decide, and he knows I have given more than he deserves and I don't owe him anything)