WTBH,
I'm still reading your posts and remembering some other at-risk family cases I've worked on a little bit.
There are a couple of ideas that come to mind that I hope are helpful to you:
You can arrange to meet your STBXAH with the girls for supervised visitation in a public place. That way you've done a few things:
You've avoided parental alienation.
You've reasonably assured your safety.
You've documented the visit.
You can also arrange for an attorney who will take your case with the confidence that your STBXAH, who has admittedly, in writing, been the 'breadwinner' is ordered to pay ALL attorney's fees. Many attorneys will take this case with confidence and not require an upfront retainer.
Also, his attempt at entering the house under the guise of financial loss to you is considered economic abuse in some states and can be awarded as part of pain and suffering in a civil suit in addition to the divorce proceedings. There are precedents in almost every state to establish that, especially in households with children.
Moving forward in this situation is especially hard since your STBXAH is especially nasty. He will fight dirty; there is no doubt about that.
Hang in there while you consider getting a little creative.