It's not going to work but darn it am I angry, sad, hurt, but not surprised. I knew this was coming and I've been waiting for it so I am not shocked but still, it's hurting a lot.
Basic details: stbxah has been living with his brother. Their parents pay the brothers rent. This was an arrangement AH offered bc it meant we could continue to pay the mortgage (which we can't if he is paying rent elsewhere) and the girls could stay in their home. He's professed loudly to anyone who will listen that the girls are his priority and he wants them to be able to stay here.
Last night I received this email. It is interesting to note that AH's brother has been HORRID to me for years and AH has told me over and over that it's me, I need to relax, I need to accept him as he is etc... Basically he allowed his family to be abusive toward me and told me it was no big deal. It's interesting to note this given what he says in his email:
What i need to talk about is my living situation. I cannot live my brother bc he is insane, and violent and I do not deserve to be treated the way he treats me. I found a place and it is something that I am going to do. I am the breadwinner and I have every right to choose how I spend that money. If there is another situation, i am open to it. I am miserable about us, and the state of our family and marriage, but i still need a room to sleep in. I am talking w the guy tomorrow and giving him 1st and last months rent and security deposit unless you decide something will change before then and let me move back in, i have no other option; i am tired of being homeless.
He is NOT homeless. We both know it too. He is using this as a threat and he WILL follow through and spend money out of resentment toward me without regard for what this will do to his girls that he pretends to care about. D3 will have to leave the school she just started and our house needs to be sold. The end of the world? No. Manipulative and evil of him to do this to his kids? Yup.
I hate him more than I ever thought possible right now. I know he's "acting like an alcoholic"... I know.. It's just one thing to intellectually know he's capable of this and another thing to have it happen and realize that he cares so little about anything but himself that he'll ruin others lives...
PS. I haven't replied and don't plan to. But I have received emails today that tell me that my silent treatment is a way to exercise power and control and that I am hurting the girls by my actions (of not letting him come back). Again I saw this coming but it still hurts to hear it.
