My mom and dad have been married almost 60 years, my mom has been an alcoholic for at least the last 40, I asked my dad recently "dad why do you stay"? He told me that he has never stopped loving the girl he fell in love with, I said but that girl is gone, he said well I still see her when I look at her.
It seems like semantics to me, he hates that she is unwilling to stop killing herself, he hates what her drinking has done to their marriage, but he cannot hate her for doing it.
For me I always love her and sometimes I hate her, but I really don't like her at all anymore, she is a self-absorbed opnionated pain in the butt, and if I was not related to her I would never be around her.
Anyway IMO the answer lies in your heart, you have to decide how you feel, what you want, etc.
I hope you figure it out, I know that after living with an alcoholic mother it would be almost impossible for me to watch my wife do that to herself.
Peace be with you,
WBD