Hi yellow Birdy
Lots of wisdom here, I'm glad you're listening. Thumper sure knows wth she's talking about
:
Actions matter. Words are weapons in my book. Tools of manipulation, blame-shifting, guilt, emotional abuse even.
When things became a little confusing it also really helped me to think about what was in my best interest, think about my boundaries, and looking for that small voice inside (or gut feeling) and trying hard to listen to it instead of ignoring or even arguing with it.
There is time. Wait and see what happens.
I love this. Focusing on myself and my boundaries is getting easier for me once I remember to do so, I've focused on others for so long, especially AH-what he's doing, how he's doing, WHO he's doing, how it impacts the kids, what I can do about it. It makes me horribly sad for ME now to see how I wasted my life and time.
This focusing on and being honest with myself can be very scary, but in the end the truth is what will set you, and myself as well, free.
Good for you for coming here, asking for advice and taking it. This stuff is a hugely steep learning curve.