Amy,
THANK YOU so much. You are speaking to me, speaking your sincere and truthful thoughts. That's what I had hoped for.
I cannot put myself into the mind of someone who is an addict or alcoholic. I don't know how they think. I have proven this time and time again.
I don't want him to think we've disowned him (we haven't), but I also don't want to provide a parachute of any kind. He needs treatment where he will learn to use tools, and change his behavior.
Oh, I so appreciate your honesty and candor. I am beginning to think that NA and AA members need to show up at ALANON and give us some advice.
See, we (codependents) always...want to FIX the problem. It's not that we are trying to be controlling, it's that we can see what others can't when they are using drugs.
Makes us a little nuts, but what else is one to do when they love someone?
I love my son as your father loves you.
Thank you...
Deb