Originally Posted by
MesoFreak 
I want to be happy but thinking about not being able to enjoy a beer makes me sad.
For dinner time with food what do you guys suggest I should drink that is good compliment to my food?
You are an intelligent young man. I would encourage you to examine the logic in the above statements.
You may not find it relevant to your current situation but many who come here have visited the "Rational recovery" website and learned about the "addictive voice" (AV) and how to recognise it.
Alcoholism has a genetic component. My father stopped drinking 45 years ago. My brother and sister have significant alcohol addiction. I believe (but am no expert) is that what is inherited is the tendency to develop "craving". As far as I can gather "normal" people do not have this.
In my experience the craving induced by alcohol gets worse over the years and makes it harder to stop. Like cancer it is best caught early.
Best of luck in your journey