Is your husband going to AA? I would think after 126 days sober and if he was going to meetings he would understand a little about his disease and the program.
He is manipulating you even while sober. You need to be strong and your kids should know their chores to do ahead of time. Perhaps you can sit and make them each a list for the day or week.
School starts soon, so this part of it will be behind you. Have your kids participate in after school activities so they don't need to be home.
If he is picking on you for whatever reason, tell him you don't want to hear it and to go away. He is being a jerk ..... saying he loves you and acting like he does are two different things.
I can tell a pile of horses**t I love it, but that doesn't mean I do! That's exactly what he is treating you like, a big pile of crap and that is mean and wrong. I feel badly for you, I really do.