a friend: I brought you this Mickey Mouse (stuffy) because you love Disneyworld so much
me: I've never been to Florida
friend: but Paul said you went to Florida on your honeymoon and you both loved it
me: that was his first wife
friend: OMG I'm so sorry - I feel so bad
me: Don't worry, don't feel bad - nothing he says or does surprises me anymore
me: Oh, and Camilla did you know he's available
love the quack thing by the way, nothing he says phazes me anymore. He's a big idiot duck quack, quack
and then there's that everlasting bottle - you know the one - "where'd you get the money for the liquor yesterday"? "I found that bottle, it was an old one".
and those headaches caused by the slipped discs in his neck.