One thing that I have come to believe through therapy is that alcoholism and verbal abuse are two very separate issues. A man isn't abusive because he is drinking, he is abusive because he is abusive. A huge amount of men drink alcohol, some alcoholics, some not but a lot of these men have a deep rooted moral and values core where they know right from wrong. They know that it is not acceptable to abuse woman, so dont do it, whether they are under the influence or not. They are happy drunks, or sleepy drunks or just use self control."
I wonder about this a lot. Is the abuse a symptom of addiction? Is it totally separate? They say the addiction is merely a symptom of something else, and sometimes I wonder if the abusive addicts are suffering from personality disorders or other mental illnesses and the abuse comes from that and is simply triggered by the alcohol/drugs.