I'm so sorry and I have been there. One thing I have learned....I don't need to be married....the dog has the utmost respect for me. I'd love a decent relationship, but there are a lot of weeds in the garden to pick through and my back hurts.
I've stopped worrying about everyone else and just worry about me FIRST. it's too bad that your husband got laid off, but so are a lot of people, many of them over 50...and they don't just lay down and drink about it....they find jobs, they support their family and they thank their spouses for supporting them....if they are at home, they make their mates life easier by assuming some of the RESPONSIBILITY.
and if they run to their mamas....at that age, you can do better and you will.
Mr. Fandy got tossed out after I found out he had 3 mortgages on his own little condo he bought in 1984, he was only working part-time and living both with/off me and at the OTB...Last year he had IRS penalties to the tune of 33K (lump sum payment). His credit cards are maxxed out, his car is 12 years old and he has not replaced his dishwasher, or broken fridge....but he still thinks "winning" $5-600. is making him a big time high roller.
He refuses to find full-time work...I have no use for that, I work very hard for my $$$, I'm not a big gambler (unless you count $20.00 on the nickel slots once or twice a year at a casino)...I invest what I used to spend on booze into double principal payments on my house and make an improvement/remodel when I can afford it....I save for a rainy day, in case I do lose my job...or have to retire early.
i've found that being the good wife/nice guy is not appreciated by the men I've picked...but it was sure a learning experience.