Welcome back, thanks for sharing your story...it saves me from having to type out mine...again. because mine is so like yours.
I wouldn't play roulette again with my life, but I can say that my last relapse was a real wake up call.
I live in a place that has no meetings, so I come here (and one other group I belong to) online daily to keep me grounded in recovery. It's very important to me to stay connected, read people's stories and experiences and share my own.
An addict alone is in dangerous company. Thanks for being here when I come to check in.