TonyF

Here's the deal; I'm 20 years old and was diagnosed with acute pancreatitis & enlarged liver this march. In May I jumped out of a 2nd floor apartment window while drunk (not for reasons suicidal but more for "fun") & fractured tibia in left leg.

I still drink too much. Binge at least once a week.

I've stopped exercising for a year. I feel like my health is going to ****.

I have also been living off my savings since February and blown through about $30k in the past 4 months. I am spending more than I make and I am down to my last $6000 in reserve. I have no formal education and can't get a job, but I do know how to make money with some businesses. But the rewards are directly proportionate to my focus and effort.

Bottom line, unless I have mental clarity (for which I need to stop drinking) I am going to go bankrupt by next month and I am seriously worried for my health.

I tried AA, it doesn't work for me. I went to counseling last year but stopped. Thinking of going back, not sure if it's going to help.

Other misadventures include being caught 5 times for drinking and driving, assaulting several people including a very good friend, having (protected) sex with prostitutes who I wouldn't dream of touching with a 10 foot pole while sober, streaking, bad conversations which are highly embarassing later, blackouts.

I live in India (******). I feel that the main reason I drink is that I simply can't have any fun without it. I live for that day of the week when I go out, get smashed in (Indian version of) a strip club. It's the only thing that I enjoy. I am not sure if this qualifies as addiction. I went 14 days without alcohol last month on a self attempted quit, and 8 days after being diagnosed with the pancreatitis.

Clearly it isn't sustainable or very wise though. Just looking for some motivation or workable advise...