Originally Posted by
fedup3 
I know what you are saying there are times I just start crying for no apparent reason. When my divorce comes I know it will be very difficult to have no contact with him, he's not someone to be ignored and very persistent. He keeps asking me how did we get to this place where we're at and I can only answer him that the alcohol took over him, sad for the both of us.
I feel your pain. It is very sad to think that someone could give up so very much for something so little. I can't think of anything that he would have asked me to do for the sake of our relationship, that I would have said no. I only wish he could see that I only wanted the best for him because I cared so much; not because I was trying to control or change him.
Sometimes it hits me like a tidal wave. The tears. I'm checking my phone for texts all the time and there are none. No emails, no messages or anything. I mean, I guess that's what no-contact is all about. Still, I miss them.
I went out and bought the Codependent No More book this evening.
I might try to go to the meeting tomorrow night. I don't know if I'm ready.
Thank you and hugs - -