Hwsm,
Sending you lots of hugs. Is there something going on astronomically right now? I have had some yearning today too. I’m on day 39 of No Contact. I even go to the alcoholism section sometimes because I identify with the people who are counting days sober.
This is what I’ve been telling myself today, to stay “sober” and stay on track: That relationship must be and is a turning point for me. I will not live like that ever again. It wasn’t even really living. It was surviving, a fire-alarm life, turmoil and futility, never sustained building and creating, never deep solid relaxation. I will not live that way again. I value myself and my life, and everyone around me. I, and they, want me to be happy and stable and they want me to laugh and thrive. Just like an alcoholic, if I keep going down the codie rabbit hole, my life not only declines, but it also affects everyone around me. I do NOT want to hurt them as I hurt myself. Anyway, that’s how I wrestle my cravings down.
I really understand, hwsm. Sometimes without warning, it pulls at me again. We can do this. We ARE doing this.
One day at a time.
BBlooms
P.S. Aw, shoot, that made me all weepy. Might as well cry, hwsm. That doesn't mean we can't do this. Just processing the stuff it is time to process. Hugs again.
Last edited by blueblooms14; 07-17-2011 at 03:19 PM.
Reason: to add ps