[QUOTE=Sharkbait;3035414]Man this is tough.
her mum gets back on the phone and starts guilting me into staying with AW.
I stop her and say i cant take it all.
I have 3 boys to look out for.
i know the timing is bad but i cant take anymore.
Perhaps the timing is just right.
I love her to bits but i just cant take anymore,
i cant take the abuse the anger the feeling that im the bad guy that is the cause of the problems.
i need some help, some kind words or some harsh truths.
I am glad that you know about the three C's, so you can keep in mind that you did not cause her drinking. And yes, we do need help when we have been so badly affected by someones sickness. If you can get to some al-anon meetings, that will help more than you can imagine, to take care of yourself and your boys. your wife is her own responsibility.
All i know right know is this is the hardest thing i have EVER done in my life, and its so hard to be strong.
Yes, it is very hard. We love them, and cannot make them well. It seems that it is a choice for them to stop drinking and when they don't we want to help them to make right choices. but it is a sickness, and she needs help in order to choose to get well, and part of that motivation to get well will come from reaping the consequences of her bad choices.
my best to you, and your boys. i hope that she chooses a sober life.
hugs
chicory