I waffle back and forth, in my thinking on his mental capabilities. He is an air head, you could say, tho he can program a computer and helps people all the time.
He worked very hard in construction for five months, but some of the guys said he would not listen and did his own thing. i believe that, for he hates to admit that he does not know something. poor guy had no influence from his dad, except learning how to feel entitled and to be an a$$.
he was always biting nails , irritable, hates red tape, filling out apps. etc. makes poor judgement calls, like staying up all night, before he has to go to work. in order to play video games with friends . half life, other role games.
he cannot seem to manage the simplest things. he cannot even take time to wring out a cloth that he wipes down the counter with- he leaves it soaking wet. always did this!
if he makes a mess on floor, he gets a tiny piece of towel, and wipes it poorly, leaving a mess still. doing dishes? he leaves them dirty,usually. but he goes all the way through the motions.
he seems to have other things on his mind all the time. he cannot seem to make time for the normal things that most of do each day. he has always been this way. irritable, impatient, but he used to be a lot sweeter. He cant wait to get back to his world, the computer. he has been that way for as long as I can remember. as a matter of fact, his desire to have access to internet motivated many of his choices in life. the friends that had internet were the ones he wanted to be with.
He could go to school. but he says it is impossible. he is pissed at the economy and the greed and injustice. he would love to be someone and have something, but says that is impossible these days. he is so negative about any choices. he has had many jobs. in retail, construction, food, but he just does not want to go to bed, and get up and go to work, so his absenteeism loses him the jobs. he gets hired easily, for he is so well spoken and can act, but keeping it is the challenge.
he denies that he is avoiding work, but i dont believe that. he is never gone when i come home from work . is usually sleeping, in order to stay up all night.
i am gonna go sign up for al-anon online. i cant keep going on and on about him. it is not fair, it does not really matter, he is who he is. and intellectualizing does nothing to help. he is too complicated.
maybe he is just SUPER SELFISH, and also alcoholic.
hugs to all, and many many thanks, for sharing your stories of hope.
love
chicory