Thank you NYCDoglvr. Its actually nice to hear from someone that has been successfullt sober. I know he has a disease and I've tried hard to support him but he keeps blaming me for everything and pushing me away and it just really hurts. I recognize that I need to just heal myself right now and not worry about what he is or isn't doing. I just wish there was a healthy way for us to go through the recovery but I know this is a challenging time. I'm just letting go...and letting God. Not gonna obsess, just try and get through the days and care for our daughter the best way I can. In my heart I admit I'm hoping for a happy ending but I'm sure that will go away the more confidence I gain in myself.