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Old 08-17-2004, 05:33 PM
  # 4 (permalink)  
Elaine2
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Las Vegas, NV
Posts: 29
Hi there Disapointed,
You just told my story, only it's 23 years for me. Sometimes I think we are all married to the same man. I stay because it's not all bad all the time. (And I do not want to start over at age 49, ugh) What I have done, though, is become very independent. I actually expect disapointments, so when I don't get them, I'm surprised! Gabe's Plan B works well for me too. I could be very depressed as I sit here and write this, as a binge is in the making, but I'm so tired of years of feeling bad, I have decided to take steps to feel good again. Remember feeling good? Relaxed? Not on edge? What I find fascinating, about myself is my reactions to verbal abuse and disapointment are changing. It's as if, the more I learn and concentrate on becoming the person I want to be, the less I am upset about what's coming my way in the form of bad behavior, and it gets easier and easier to blow off. I have come to the conclusion that I can have a happy life without my AH meeting any of my expectations. Without treating him badly. Maybe that's not expecting enough, I don't know. All I know is that it works for me, and you will find some way to reconcile the dissapointment you have, if you continue to stay, because we HAVE to. It's either that or we are miserable. And I know I'm sick to death of miserable. Well, that's just what I have to offer. Keep coming back, it's really helped me!
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