Originally Posted by
Thumper 
The thing is many of us were in the same boat when we got married. Most of us do not marry the full blown alcoholic, unemployed, unclean, untrustworthy, drink a case of beer, stealing allowance money from their children, pass out twice a day and **** the bed man. We (I) married the guy that drank to much but wasn't that bad.
When I got married I was not the beaten down, exhausted, confused, overwhelmed, isolated, afraid, uncertain, resentful woman I was when I left. I had it under control when I got married.
We are just on the other end of the story now.
Of course you have your own story to write. You have awareness at the first chapter. He is an alcoholic. Keep reading here, attend al-anon, do any other self-help steps that work for you.
Yes, THIS for me, accept I did not have awareness. How naive I was and happy I finally found someone that I thought the world of.
Looking back I remember before I got married my uncle asking AH and me about his beer drinking. It seemed like he was implying or rather he was conveying my mother's concern that AH drank too much.
Imagine I was highly offended they would even consider this. Little did I know how much it would progress.
I had a lot of things together and did lots and lots.
Maybe I should have been more aware. If I was I don't know if I would have done anything different about getting married. I don't think I would have let the alcoholism affect me as long as it did.
My kids are a blessing. Each day I pray my HP helps me in my recovery and helps their dad find recovery too.