Originally Posted by
Ponder 
From what I have read in your posts so far is this guy is emotionally abusive. ...Guess what? Emotional abuse is WORSE.. The very fact that it is hidden and unseen makes it more insidious and damaging! It changes who you are and you become a shell of the person you once were. It sucks your spirit dead.
Real love doesn't hurt, and it doesn't make you cry.
You want to see what emotional abuse does? Read my thread "Hi, I'm LaPinturaBella."
Because of the "invisible" emotional abuse, I myself came to feel invisible. Unseen, unheard, unworthy of ANYTHING good ever coming into my life. It caused me to sabotage my own life...because I felt I didn't deserve a good life. I literally just existed...barely.
Is this what you want for yourself? Is this what you want for your kids? I've been in therapy off and on for 10 years to unravel the damage and become the woman I was meant to be. And it's been just as hellish as being involved with an alcoholic. You want to know why I picked an alcoholic? Because he exhibited the same behaviors as my emotional abuser. It was "normal" to me. Again, is this what you want for your kids?
You owe it to yourself and to your future children to look at your situation with a cold, unemotional eye and to truly discern reality. I'm not trying to make you feel bad, or to attack you. I AM trying to show you the truth. You are about to tie yourself to darkness and pain and YOU DESERVE light, truth and joy.
This is not a huge party, it is not the money that is at stake...it's YOUR VERY LIFE.
Take what you want and leave the rest.