I met my RAH (using the R cautiously at this point) when I was 16, married at 22, knew for certain he had a drinking problem when I was 36, so 20 years after I met him. When did he actually become an A? Humm not sure. There were signs of drinking issues very early on but not big red flags until much much later. It think it slowly happened with a few stressful situations that made it surface and take off.