Originally Posted by
BackToSquareOne 
There's forgiveness when forgiveness is appropriate. There's acceptance of the fact that bad things happen to good people when it's not. Pain is a part of life, wallowing in the suffering and self pity is an option.
You are making an assumption here.
That darklight is wallowing.
I read the same statement and did not take from it the wallowing aspect.
We should ask questions instead of make assumptions especially on a forum where all you know about a person is some thoughts they haved posted.
I personally can't seem to find forgiveness for my AH. However, I don't by any means wallow in hatred for him on a daily basis.
I find myself angry at times, then not, then grieving at times, then nothing.
This is a normal response any person would go through after riding through some of the junctures most of us here have endured.
To go through a healing process is normal. Using cognitive recognition to understand our emotions and attempt to deal with them is moving forward and in the end success, I think.