Shell- you are doing outstandingly well in the face of such major stuff. I think the fact that you are not letting your W know of your discovery is very very wise. I have never had the sense to keep what I "discover" to myself and when I confront AH with what I have found it's insanity x 1,000,000,000. I think you are very wise and protecting yourself and your son to be getting everything set up-- finances, lawyer, films etc... Again, I am so sorry for all you are going through...