bruingirl

I feel like al-anon is truly teaching me a lot and is very enlightening not just in teaching me how to better deal with As but in approaching my own life.

I wanted mention that I felt a little silly and a little embarrassed after the meeting today though. And I'm saying this because, like many of us do, I have been kind of obsessing about it and running it through over and over in my head, which I really need to STOP doing.

I was the last person to speak today and the person right before me was also a newcomer. She was telling so bravely and coherently her story about how her AH had become abusive towards her and her child after a binge some days ago and the police and CPS had become involved in their situation. Today was also the first meeting that I had actually spoken at, so I then told my story about how I had felt betrayed by XABF who had cheated on me (shaky voice and all).

After the meeting, one of the women came up and hugged both of us newcomers. When she did so to me, I started crying. Completely didn't expect it. I keep obsessing over that now because I feel so silly and weak for crying about my problems when I read the posts on SR and listen to the other women at the meeting address the problems that they have dealt with in such strength for SO MANY years. A lot of the people in my particular community are much older and I am by FAR the youngest person at the meetings. I guess I just feel silly and dumb crying about my problems in comparison.