IMHO you don't need to tiptoe around your feelings to protect his. He's in early recovery and so are you and his needs are no more or less important than yours. I know what you mean about being worried to bring things up, but in a relationship that's something that needs to happen. And again, just IMHO, you aren't giving him the opportunity to hopefully use the tools he got out of rehab if he is living in an insulated world where no one says anything to him that he might possibly not like. If he is not ready or able to live life on life's terms that isn't your fault and perhaps you are worried about rocking the boat since you see him being sober and are worried that if you ask for too much he might fall off the wagon? That's on him, not you.
Sorry things are not as good as you wish they were. It is really hard to live with a spouse who feels distant and really isn't there in the ways we wish they were.