The self fulfilling prophecy remark is a personal favorite of my AH too. It's a convenient way for him to compartmentalize all of his behaviors/actions/words etc... If I dare suggest that I expect him to behave as history shows he will, I get told that bc I am so convinced he's going lie/drink/break promises etc... I create the very thing I want to avoid.
I'm powerful huh!?
I used to point out to him when he'd say this that if I could "create" the negative self fulfilling prophecies, didn't he think I'd create positive ones too?
That usually shut him up.
Same with quacking about how I "cause" him to drink. If I cause his drinking then surely I'd be able to stop it too and we both know how well that's worked out I'd tell him and then he'd storm off and drink...
Obviously it was stupid to even engage in those conversations but it's hard to keep my mouth shut when such insanity is being spewed...
All of this is past tense fyi... I have no intention of having these conversations any more...