Shannon, I asked my XH about it and he blamed me - I was unattractive, he didn't feel it for me. We had our kids already, and that part of life is over.
Like I hadn't realized that after we did it once every six months, at my initiation. And he refused to seek the assistance of even the little blue pill.
So I asked, very gently, if he minded if I got a boyfriend? Which I never would, but I was trying to help him understand that he was making a decision for my intimacy needs as well...
Well that made him mad. I still don't see why, logically, since I was obviously so undesirable to him.