I didn't mean to sound so obnoxious with the "no lectures" mandate.... I'm just a wreck and didn't want to feel worse but if anyone wants to lay it out for me no matter how harshly, feel free. Maybe I need to hear it.
I wanted this to be as unacrimonious as possible and clearly there's no chance in hell that's going to be possible.
Everything I NEVER wanted is happening and it sucks and I can't do a damned thing to stop it (divorce, acrimonious one at that, parent who will try to split kids, kids in harms way being with a parent, parent who is sick and has no desire to get better no matter what the cost etc...)