Thank you, theuncertainty. It is tough, it's a good reminder though that I can't let down my guard.
LaPinturaBella, Nothing unique about the center of the month as far as I can tell, except that that's when he shows up. I think it has more to do with him staying away for about a month, than any particular date, excluding the one that started it all - Valentine's Day. (Which also happened to be a little over a month after he got out of rehab/recovered from his car accident).
I'm not worried about his "wearing me down" just yet, because it's all words, and it's better to have him verbally assault me once a month than verbally assault me every hour, so this is still an improvement.
If he doesn't give up, he will start to accelerate, but from what I've seen him do before it'll be words more often before it turns physical, so I'll have a warning. (Thank goodness!) That said, I am getting all my options together now.
I did stop by the police station last night, and they gave me some information and some numbers I can call, so I'll start on that tonight. (Last night I was baking pie, and there's no way I'm letting XABF get between me and my pie. *Grins*)
Originally Posted by
LaPinturaBella 
Is there a self defense class in your area you can take? Some tips I learned from going to college in a rough neighborhood...hold your car keys with each key between each of your fingers and make a fist. Do this when going to and from the car. If you need to punch, you have some extra little weapons in that fist. Always look into the back seat of the car before you unlock the door to make sure no one is hiding in there. And if you're walking and feel someone is following you, cross the street and keep objects (preferably parked car between you and the other person. If you feel the need, drop and roll under one of the parked cars and scream your head off. It causes a commotion and the "assailant" won't take the time to pull you out from under the car.
Both of these are brilliant - thank you! I will add that to my list of options, with my pepper spray.
A couple of my neighbors do know about him. I should share more with them, about how he's still coming by.
I don't trust his mental state, either. Is he capable of getting physical - probably. Especially if he's still drinking (he's more subtle when he's sober). But he's not there, yet.
jds0401, thank you. I do know I can enjoy any apartment I move to. I'd prefer to stay in this one for awhile, since I can afford it and this is the kind I always wanted - but if I have to move, I will. In the meantime, I do have a year on this one because the lease was just renewed, and at the moment I can avoid him (I just wish he'd stop coming). If that changes, I'll have to make changes, too.
naive, thanks. His sister doesn't really call me anymore, we've only talked twice since I broke up with XABF. The first time she just called to ask how I was doing, and didn't pry with any particulars aside from suggesting that I see a psychologist, if I didn't have one already.
I don't call her. And I don't think she'll call me again, either, to be honest.
You guys are the best. Thank you.