Quit being a masochist. This whole thing is abusive. I know-like I said, been there done that. There was always the knock down drag out screaming matches btwn me and my immature exabf, then a few days later "oh, I miss him. Oh, he's not so bad. Oh, he's a poor baby who has no other friends and no one else who REALLY loves him but me, maybe if I just love him a little more, he will change.."
WHAT A JOKE. Wasted 3.5 yrs of my life off and on 10 times with him like that.
Pls don't make my same mistake.
Originally Posted by
bruingirl 
did something stupid. went to a friends house last night and after having a drink (im not an A) and watching a movie decided to call the XAB at 1 am on my way home. was feeling a little needy i guess and like i should be there for him regardless of what happened and what he does because he really needs me (the stupid romantic movie i never shouldve rented). wanted to try to mend things again and get an explanation about whats going on with this new girl, just so i can be on my toes. i felt like i was making some headway for once (the anger must not have been as intense because he was half asleep). he told me to call him in the morning. i woke up and called him first thing, excited that we were going to have a conversation making some headway again and that i would hopefully have my best friend somewhat back again. i should have known better. i really should have. but i did it to myself again: the entire phone call he was just stabbing the knife over and over and over again. saying how he doesnt feel any hurt after our breakup (he feels "the best hes ever felt"), that im the "worst person on the planet ever", that all of his friends think that i am crazy (and mine think badly of him as well but i didnt feel the need to throw that in his face), that i should have been there for his graduation and bday (which i took work off for, and planned out...but he never called me post argument), and the whole time i was so upset i was balling and just trying to talk to him. and he hung up on me and texted me saying "shut up and stop crying if you want to talk to me or ill tell the whole world what you did and actually ruin your live on purpose the way you did mine" (no, i didnt "do" anything to him nor am i trying to "ruin" his life). i kept begging him to take the wall down and just have a conversation with me like adults. i just want to move on past the anger but he cant. hes raging and hes crazy. and i dont know why i feel so addicted to him
