Good for you Autumn!
I just wanted to answer your question about 'what happened to the man you fell in love with?'. He is there and he is an alcoholic. Same man with a disease. I've learned that the alcoholic and the person are actually one and the same.
The mistake we make (as codependents) is thinking that they are fighting to 'get out'... like a butterfly struggles to get out of the cocoon.
NOT!
No, they are often quite comfy with it while in it, esp if they find enabling partners. They seek recovery when things around them start falling apart and they realize the pain of living that life is greater than its advantages.