It seems really hard at first to admit someone you love is an alcoholic. Attending alanon really helped me with that. I am still new, but they say right to the new comers that alcoholism is a disease, not a moral issue. You wouldn't be embarassed to tell your family if he had cancer, and it is as uncontrollable as that.
I am feeling terrible too, with the emotional roller coaster I am living on. My heart is with you, definitely try alanon and read on SR. You will realize you are not alone. And once you understand better what it is he is suffering from you won't see it as an embarassment or something you need to feel shame for.
Hugs.