Congratulations on getting your degree! That is a nice feeling, I am sure.
sorry that you are having to go through this, when it should be a happy time. We just cannot trust anyone else with our happiness, especially an addict. sounds like he needs more time to figure things out, and that he cant be trusted.
Things get easier when you do not focus on the addict, but on taking care of yourself, and those you are responsible for. the babes.
I encourage you to listen to your gut feelings about this. That peace you enjoyed could be yours all the time. If he does not want to live a clean life, and be honest, do you really want to be part of that? What are your kids going to get out of this situation? What do you really want?
good that you want to get to alanon. that will help you soooo much, and will help you to answer the questions you have. others there will have much to share about similar experiences.
hope it gets better very soon. you should not have to go through life being the only one being responsible in a marriage.