Thread: Told AH...
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Old 05-02-2011, 07:45 AM
  # 12 (permalink)  
wanttobehealthy
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Originally Posted by tinabanina View Post
It is more the people that don't bother to do ANY research about the disease, that don't understand what is is truly like to be in my position but continue to rattle off advice (a lot, if not all, of the people I am close to have no experience dealing with an alcoholic, or the kind of relationship I am in with my partner).

Again, I understand it is coming from a place of concern, but getting told "you aren't doing enough... you are doing too much... his parents aren't doing enough, you should get them to help him more.. you should help him more... etc, etc.." every day is just making me frustrated.
I really get what you're saying tinabanina... it is frustrating to be told what to do by people who are not living it. Here's what I've done...

I have stopped talking to people who don't "get" alcoholism. All that happened when I did was I'd spin my wheels trying to get them to understand and be upset that they didn't. And to be fair, I didn't "get" alcoholism until recently even though I've lived with it for 10+ yrs, so how I can I expect people not dealing with it or people who choose to be in denial (hello in laws!) to "get it". I'd LOVE to have a wider group of face to face people to talk to who are already my close friends and who really "get" it... but wanting that and trying to get it from places I know I can't just makes me more miserable than I was to begin with...
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