I went to a lecture by an addiction therapist..he said that he and his colleagues love 12 step, but differ from alanon in the not physically detaching.He said it was basically impossible long term to remain detached in the relationship and they advise getting into recovery and giving it a year..a year for the codie to recover and see if in that time the spouse finds recovery.
His theory was that if the spouse/partner did not seek recovery in that time period, it was not a healthy relationship to stay in.I LOVE alanon..go all the time, but this makes sense to me.
So, when you said you might give it a year..I DO think that's a really good idea.Gives you time to make a plan, OR perhaps your husband will find true recovery...either way it doesn't feel like waiting endlessly for something that may or may not happen..