Hmmm interesting thread on so many levels. Both as an ACOA and as a parent.
My parents divorced when I was about 2, but my AF (now recovering) had custody of my sister and I every other weekend and one night a week or something like that.
He was an active addict for the first 11 years of my life. I have very few memories from my childhood, but they few I have a pretty ugly. By the time I was an adolescent I had figured out that I could survive by not being noticed at all, that was what I strove for.
My daughter's father, my exABF, now lives far away from us. As I have progressed in my recovery she seems to feel more safe, confident and independent. But, as a single parent, I often walk through the door to the release of her pent-up frustration, hurt and sadness. I feel okay with that, I am learning how to support her in a healthy way and I am helping her have a childhood I never had.
I really like what Anvilhead had to say. I think that really sums up what it must be like from their side looking up at us. Thanks for that.