Thumper

We didn't either. My xah stepped off the ledge at the very end and ranted and raved for hours and hours but prior to that we did not fight in front of the kids. We actually didn't really fight and argue at all ever.

Our older kids were taking their bickering to an entirely new level. It was outrageous. We mentioned it to the counselor and also that all that fighting/arguing/bickering was not modeled to them because we didn't do it.

It wasn't that we had a harmonious relationship (anything but), we just didn't verbally fight or argue. The counselor simply said the children will do the fighting the adults aren't doing. They feel that vibe in the house. They do not understand it but it was thick and they pick up on it and argue it out with each other.

I did not see then just how dysfunctional our house was. There was no physical abuse, there was no arguing and fighting, there was no mean words but oh man, the dysfunction was rampant none the less. It was an undercurrent, an emotional tension and confusion, nothing you could point at but it was there.