When I first spoke to my attorney, he told me that facts speak louder than conclusions. What does that mean?
Well, I've concluded that my wife is an AW. The courts, at this point do not have facts. Well, they would but I haven't filed yet. I have a video recording which is admissible and my attorney said it helps tremendously.
I have several audio recordings and a video recording which my H knew about my recording. I don't have it totally together on these "tapes" myself but he is definitely drunk. I had forgotten about this. I bet this is proof-- I have to ask the lawyer I am seeing on Thurs. Thanks for reminding me.
Here's something else he told me about proof. There are companies you can hire. I think it's called CFL or the eyes and ears of the Judge and case investigators. They will do investigative work on your behalf. They will dig into CC purchases at liquor stores or bars. They will conduct random drug tests. They will monitor things. It costs a buttload but there are companies who will do this and my lawyer certainly made this an option. Average cost is 7-12k.
Wow, that would be awesome-- if it were free
As it is I have no money to pay for a lawyer so the one I am seeing on Thurs is going to have to be willing to do a payment plan or I am back to square one.
In my case, my AW doesn't have a DUI. No public records of her intoxication. So it would be my word against hers, minus the videos. In the meantime he suggested that I maintain a detailed journal. If I conclude that she'd been drinking, I need to include details on how I knew that. Examples may be...I found 1.75 litter of Vodka in her closet behind her clothes. It was half full yesterday. It's empty today. Or, I found 20 beer cans in the recycle bin. They weren't there yesterday.
My H doesn't have a DUI either. I called the police many times when he was drinking and took off driving. But they never found him. I have a journal but a lot of it is "I KNOW he's drunk but I have no proof". Short of having a breathalizer machine at home I don't know how to document how I know he is drinking...
I realize that you're progressed beyond me in the timeline so you may not have time. My whole point is that you can require random drug/alcohol tests. I want to say it's called and ETG test which covers a period of 80 hours. You can't even have mouthwash or it would trigger positive.
I would LOVE to have that required. That's precisely what I think needs to be in place if he wants to have time alone with the girls. Problem is he is very smart and if there is any way to outsmart a test he'll find it.