wanttobehealthy

Sure, feel free.

I think my issue is with people expecting everyone to be where they are or spending more time judging others' progress than seeing what HAS been accomplished.

Honestly, the more I am defending myself and saying repeatedly that I am NOT waiting for my AH to change, the more I am questioning what I thought I felt sure about... Why it is so hard for a select few around here to accept people where they are at and offer opinions with tact or at least not abusively, is beyond me. I am afraid that I disagree with BB and DO think that there are some people who post with bad intent. I think that there are some people who try hard to seem quite holier than thou and who in all likelihood still have a lot of their own issues to deal with. Perhaps they should stop bullying others and focus on themselves.

Much like dealing with my AH telling me I AM the cause of his drinking, someone telling me over and over that they know better than me how I feel feels downright manipulative and controlling.

I have a lot to deal with right now as do we all and if people can't say what they think without berating and attacking then they really ought to keep quiet. It's not okay to call abusive "honesty". Honesty and bluntness are fine. Abusive bullying is not.