Originally Posted by
LaTeeDa 
I'm not trying to tell you how to live your life. The things you post about are the same things I went through five years ago. My experience is very similar to yours. I was also very good at rationalizing, justifying, minimizing, and denial.
Obviously, you don't want to hear about my experience. If what you are doing is working for you, then by all means, carry on. The Buddhists have a saying about life:
Pain is mandatory, suffering is optional.
All the best,
L
Actually I'd love to hear your experience. Really. What I am not loving is being told "I know better than you" in a really pompous way without actually being told anything specific.
Share your story if you wish. Maybe trying to force me to "get it" the way you want me to isn't the way it will work. I also think you might not want to believe this but I have taken a lot of steps to protect myself and my kids that a few months ago I wouldn't have and so being told that I am not putting my kids first is pretty harsh. I am doing this as fast and as well as I can given the way life is right now. I am interested in hearing what your story is and it may be that it is very similar to mine and it may be that it's not. I think that it's better (at least this is what I take from al anon) that we share our stories and let each other draw parallels as we can and give gentle advice -- being hit over the head and attacked- which is how it felt to me, is not a real great way to get someone interested.
And for what it's worth, I realized as I was feeling really frustrated earlier, that my AH must have felt much the same for years as I tried to tell him what to do and how he wasn't "seeing" it... So, maybe my HP wanted me to have that experience and know a bit better what that was like for him. Yet another reason to not tell him or anyone for that matter what to do or how to do it.
I'm sorry you think I am not interested in your story. I am.