Oh dear, that's almost identical to a conversation Im having with my AH now. We talked about divorce/separation.. And at first he said, I'll go. He was trying to placate me by being the amicable spouse (ie. See how nice I am? How could you make me leave?). I said, "fine. Let's get the divorce started and get the show on the road!". And then he switched to mr. Pissy. "I'm leaving MY house. Why do I have to go?!?" I responded with..."fine. I'll go."
I told him tonight that I had found several houses I was interested in renting. I'd let him know as soon as I had picked one and had a scheduled move date.
He was shocked. "I cant believe you really are quitting. I really thought you were better than that." "like I said, I'll let you know when I have something set up. Good night."
All of his attempts to manipulate me back into the dance were failing miserably. I want what I want for very valid and truthful reasons. No amount of discussion or emotional terrorism from my AH is going to change that.
Though your AH is in recovery, the isms are still clearly in effect. Keep your feet oN the ground, and your eyes focused on you.